Land Of Silly - Bad Singing for a Stressed out World :)

Sunday, Nov 02, 2008

Dead Cisco Sketch - I'm and IT PRo Song

(238 downloads)

Download this episode (5 min)
Special Thanks to Monty Python, for the original LumberJack Song for without this would never have happened.

Extra special thanks to Mitch Garvis for planting the idea in my head. He can take some of the blame :)

Karaoke-version from www.karaoke-version.com
Re-edits to source Karaoke by Sean P. Kearney

The Dead Cisco Sketch

"'Ello Hack?"

"Who you calling a Hack."

"Sorry, me lungts are full of sheetrock. Look Never mind that, I wish to register a complaint"

"Sorry we're closed for upgrades..."

"Never mind tryin that. I would like to complain about this 24 port switch, I purchased from this very shop nary a half an hour ago"

"ahhh yes, the uh... the Uh Cisco Catalyst. What's uh... What's wrong with it?"

"I'll tell you whats wrong with it. It's completely dead! That's whats wrong with it"

"No it's not. It's in power saving mode. Beautiful switch the Cisco. Pretty lights."

"The lights have nothing to do with it. It's completely dead!"

"It's not dead, it's in power saving mode. Pretty lights eh?"

"Right then. If it was working fine, why did it do nothing when it got back to my site"

"The Cisco normally operates in a low power mode on startup. Most likely a delayed startup to preseve the capacitors. Beautiful design. Such a nice colour"

"Now explain to me then, why when I arrived on site did it split apart and fall into two halves on the floor..."

"The cisco Catalyst self disassembles for easy storage. Lovely switch. What a nice name."

"Now let me explain something to you. I found out the only reason this switch was in one piece when I got it... Was that it had been nailed together."

"Well of COURSE it was nailed together! Look if I hadn't nailed those two halves together, the cpu processing power would have overcame the case, bent it in half with the heat

and you'd have seen it launch into the air like a rocket... *WHOOSH*"

"Look you, this switch wouldn't *WHOOSH* or *HUM* or *GROANT* if you shoved a stick of dynamite inside of it. It's completely dead."

"It's not dead. It's in power saving mod...."

"It's NOT is power saving mode, it's dead. Kaput. Useless. A doorstop. Bereft of power and functionality, it's become another "Brick in the Wall". If you hadn't nailed

those two halves together, it would have become Book Ends on Steve Ballmers bookshelf. THIS is a DEAD SWITCH!"

"....Hmmm... well I guess I better replace it then..."

"Thank you."

moment later

"Uh sir, I just checked the back room and we're right out of Cisco Catalysts."

"I see..."

"I could get you an Arcnnet passive hub..."

"Pray does it crosslink to a Cat 7 network?"!"

"Not Really."

"Well it's only a @#%#@$@#$ Replacement!!!"

-------------------

The IT PRo Song

I never wanted to do this job in the first place.

I always wanted to be.... to be.... AN IT PRO!

Piano Music (guy in the background, screaming and fading out. "Get Back here you. I'll get you for this. Slimy little"

Swinging from light fixture to light fixture
Diving in to Ciscos and Junipers
Crawling through ceiling tiles and eating sheetrock
Pulling wires! Living off the soda machine!
Playing with Raids and Clusters.
Flying through infrastructure setups
Rebuilding SQL Tables for Fun!
Fighting viruses and destroying evil.
Saving the day every night
With my Fluke Meter by my side!
As I sing
I sing
I SING!

OHhhhhh I'm an IT PRO and I'm OK
I work all night and I drink all day

He's an IT PRO and HE'S OK
HE WORKS ALL NIGHT AND HE drinkS ALL DAY

I SETUP RAIDS and BACKUPS TOO
Strengthen the back end
I help out all the users
I like to be their friend.

He's Set's up Raids and Backups too
He's strengthen's the back end
He helps out all the users
and likes to be their friend

He's an IT PRO and HE'S OK
HE WORKS ALL NIGHT AND HE drinkS ALL DAY

I terminate and demarcate,
And run Cat 6e wires
I look for packs of matches
and try to start small fires

He terminates and demarcates,
And runs Cat 6e wires
He looks for packs of matches
and tries to start small fires?

He's an IT PRO and HE'S OK
HE WORKS ALL NIGHT AND HE drinkS ALL DAY

I fix the mail, And servers too
And race right down the hall
And if you refuse to pay me
I'll whiz upon the wall

He'll fix the mail, and servers too
and race right down the hall
And if you refuse to pay him
He'll whiz upon the wall?! EeeeEwwwwww!!!!!!

"I guess nobody wants to go Hooters then..."

In Unison "HOOTERS!"

klump klump klump

I'm (He's) an IT Pro and I'm (He's) ok
I (he) work all night and I (he) drink all day
I'm (He's) an IT Pro and I'm (He's) ok
I (he) work all night and I (he) drink all day